Wednesday, June 5, 2013
They tell me I'm strong
I read somewhere...a comment from someone...that you never get over something like this. Um, that is NOT encouraging. I know it may very well be the truth, but I'm in need of some denial and some shrink said that's one of the five stages of grief, so I'm entitled to it. To me, that says this pain will never let up. A lifetime of this? I'm sorry, but I am just.not.up.to.that. No, I mean it. To quote Kay Arthur, "I just keep up waking up every day, like it or not." It's so spot on because you can't desire it, no matter how much you're supposed to, you can't fathom one more day, much less many, MANY days hobbling around this earth with half a heart very faintly beating, every single bit of energy you have spent on wiping tears, remembering to breathe, and trying to console yourself with things that are small consolations.